June 4th

So Pahoa was amazing and I've not felt the itch to write this bad in awhile.
Genevieve pointed out Cinderland, not to amazing she says, I've also heard from others it's kind of weird. Her place was further into the area of Wawa in the district of Puna. The coolest cottage ever. 1 room with a closet but handbuilt, big windows. She stays on land owned by this rrally cool woman Adele Wynn. Violinist, yoga instructor, and massage therapist. Her home was absolutely beautiful, even a developed composting outhouse, a dog, 4 cats, coco trees, huge garden, solar electricity, bathtub outside. I could live like this. except too many mosquitos in Puna.
Genevieve is beautiful. did i say that already? haha
Adele is great, but who's cooler? Keiko, Shannon, Mimi, less protective. something weird about her, who knows. More uptight. Adele has a great spirit but its...authoritative almost, which is not keen with my anarchistic free spirit lifestyle. More equality I think.
The mosquitoes have rendered me (i dont even want to count but) more than 20 bites. legs, arms, knees, hands, neck, back, butt AH!! It's driving me nuts not scratching. Slapping helps.

I got to eat so many new things tonight. Taro, Ulu, fresh coco cream, 3 kinds of coconuts. The meaty ones were the best. Made pesto from almonds and fresh basil from Adele's garden. Fresh Pineapple and bananas in coco cream for breakfast. We went to the tidepools too. Amazing. Blue water.
Naked beautiful Genevieve skinny dipping.
side thought: I wonder why seeing naked men even on nude beaches weirds me out.
Penises are creepy. I don't get it. What the hell...im all about natural and blah blah blah but a naked man freaks me out. I guess im still subconsciously dealin with the molestation issues.
who wouldnt be? lol

Anyway, I saw water crabs, fishies, waves, tidepools like natural hot tubs, the beautiful SUN, coco oil shining, me getting tanner. :)
Who knew lying on a rock like a mermaid with my red hair would ever happen.
I saw a mongoose and pineapple bushes., mango trees, banana vines, breadfruit, taro, avocado trees, bamboo, sugar cane and amazing views.
The next day we went to a black sand beach. Naked old men and women. I had to get used to seeing so many penises without any control. lol
The human body is so weird. Bu surprisingly they almost all look the same. haha
there was a swing between 2 banyan trees. I swung over the waves while listening to Lily Allen.
waves pulling me in. I felt dizzy when they go back to where they came. I stayed at a safe distance. Wished we could've stayed longer, but I will have plenty of time on a beach alone next week in Kona. Hopefully Aki will help me out.

I don;t miss California. I dont miss the weather. I dont miss school. I dont miss doors and shoes and showers and toilets and processed food. I dont really miss my cottage or too many of my friends. I miss my dad a bit and both alex's and chris. I miss Chris a lot I've noticed.
And Maxi, unfortunately. I miss blogging a bit. I miss my bike.
I dont miss my computer, I dont miss really much of my life just people who i wish could be here with me. I imagined Maxi at my side through a lot of this. It's probably the worst thing to do, probably really unhealthy, but what am i to do?
and it does help me, not hinder. I havent cried once but writing this now sure makes me want to.
I imagine if he were here how we'd share a tent without needing covers. I imagine sharing the backseat of Genevieve's car holding hands looking at the ocean. Snickering and smiling and enjoying the beauty in life the way we used to. I imagine him helping me swim through the waves naked. I imagine his amazing body in the tidepools with me, laying in the sun drying. I imagined him sweating liike a faucet in the heat when painting the cottage and it raining warm tropical droplets on our bodies. I imagined him putting coco oil and block on the parts of my back I can never reach. I imagine too much, when he's not here. It's silly i know.
I didnt imagine the real live smoking volcano.

Adieu,
B