Music Jokes

Why couldn't Mozart find his teacher? ........Because he was Haydn! ------ Why did Beethoven kill all his chickens? Because they wouldn't stop saying "Bach! Bach! Bach!" -------- What's half of a tuba? a one-ba! ------- Why did Bach have so many kids? because his organ had no stops! ---------- So a guy walks into a barline and realizes he's in the next measure. --------- Little Johnny is in 7th grade band and wants to play saxophone. He tries to play sax for weeks and weeks, but just can't get it. Eventually the band director tells the boy "Johnny, when someone can't play a horn, they take away his horn, give him two sticks and make him a drummer" Johnny, outraged, responds "And I guess when they can't do that, they take away one of the sticks and make him a conductor!" ---------- So,three notes walk into a bar -- a G, an Eb, and a C. The bartender looks up and says "We don't serve minors." So the Eb leaves and the other two have a fifth between them. After a few drinks, the G falls out flat, and the experience was diminished. Eventually, the C sobers up, sees one of his friends missing, the other one passed out, and realizes to his horror that he's under a rest. C was brought to trial, found guilty and convicted of contributing to the diminution of a minor and was sentenced to 10 years of DS without Coda.